So, in a recent conversation I was asked the question 'Does it cross your mind that you're going to be on the other side of the earth in 2 months?'
I sometimes wonder how many people who have not travelled to another country for an extended period of time can really understand what it's like. I remember my first major life adventure was to live with a family for 3 months in Holland when I was 15. What really struck me when I first arrived was that it literally was like being born again. We don't realise just how much our identity, our sense of right and wrong is influence and dictated by those things and people around us. Those who serve as our safety net or even our oppressors. They all define us, help us to define where, in our personalities, our study, our lifestyles, we push for more and where we limit ourselves. When we leave these people and our familiar surroundings all this seems to get a little lost in the wind for a while. At least, that's how it was for me.
I found myself this year landed in the US with no self expectations, no reputation to uphold, no mentors to impress or young impressionable ones to be a role model for. There was nothing but me and my desire to have a good time. To explore and grow, and to encounter this country and its people with an open mind. During this journey I have been confronted with a couple of really pressing questions which I'll share here. I wonder if what you can come up with answers where I haven't:
- What happens when all the old rules
don't apply anymore.
And then you meet someone who personifies anarchy
. . .and invites you to join them?
- How many times can you keep making
new friends when you know you're going to leave them eventually,
and maybe, the number of times you'll see them again can be counted on one hand?
How deep can these relationships be?
And where does that energy that you put into them go?
- Ultimately, is travel a selfish act?
I am here to learn, to grow, to adventure. But then what?
When I get home this just becomes a fascinating story. What about the people here?
This is their home. Everything which occurs here matters more because it's permanent and is going to affect the course of their lives.
So what does this mean for me? Does it make this more real?
Does home and my life there and my relationships there matter more or less while I'm over here. And when I return home, what happens then?
It's a really weird position to be in.
I guess the way I'm looking at it is that I'm going to make the most of a good thing while I can. I'm going to get all the enjoyment I can out of it while it lasts and make all the memories and learn all the lessons I can. I guess that's why I travel so much. I believe that our life is given meaning by these things and when an opportunity comes to receive them in great depth then we should seize it with both hands.
In regards to the relationships I've made here, I guess the picture below has become my view on it. This was made by my very good and talented friend Jilly. I don't know if she knows how much this has help me to define my time and my actions here.
Wow. Some deep questions. I'll do my best, if you're still interested in other people's answers:
ReplyDelete"What happens when all the old rules don't apply anymore. And then you meet someone who personifies anarchy. . .and invites you to join them?"
Personally, anarchy has never been attractive to me. So in a sense it's not something I've really struggled with. For others, however, I'd say this; some rules stay with you, written on your heart. Generally, there's a reason for it; try not to ignore them.
"How many times can you keep making new friends when you know you're going to leave them eventually, and maybe, the number of times you'll see them again can be counted on one hand? How deep can these relationships be? And where does that energy that you put into them go?"
Yeah. I've seen a lot of people come and go too. I suppose the thing is, with each new person, they add something special to you. Where does the energy go? Generally speaking, you'll see it come back. Often when you don't expect/look for it. If not; don't worry about it. Just think of it as a gift, not something that's only lended.
"Ultimately, is travel a selfish act? I am here to learn, to grow, to adventure. But then what? When I get home this just becomes a fascinating story. What about the people here? This is their home. Everything which occurs here matters more because it's permanent and is going to affect the course of their lives. So what does this mean for me? Does it make this more real? Does home and my life there and my relationships there matter more or less while I'm over here. And when I return home, what happens then?"
It's not selfish if you share it with someone/s. It's more than a story; it's part of you. There isn't anything that is more or less real; all of it is, all of it matters. These sort of things aren't just a memory, another story; that's what it is to those you tell it to. To you, it's part of your world, your life, your experience, yourself, as much as you ant to make it. :)
I hope that's perhaps answered some of your questions. Maybe. :)